Well readership, it’s been one helluva year, and now it’s nearly over. I hope you’re all out enjoying a very potent beverage right now so when you’re puking up Pepto in the morning, this post will seem a lot funnier. (That was not a personal reference. Especially not to anyone currently residing in SSR.) Believe it or not, DBIH was founded in the year of our lord god jesus fucking christ 2009! We’re almost 6 months old! (This calls for an ice cream cake.) We’ve seen our share of ups and downs (myself and Afrika’s heigh difference, anyone and Dan Brown, par exemple), but on the whole it’s been a great year, especially for love. Look at Lindsay and Sam! Wait… But look at the economy! Fuck… Our president? In Hawaii… Well, the Real World DC started yesterday! So we’ll end on a … high note… sure. So, while you’re drinking margs and eating your weight in tortilla chips and salsa at a certain mexican restaurant in DC or in California, aborting third trimester fetuses and forcing people to marry their dogs, or in a certain northeastern industrial state in the middle of nowhere doing nothing on New Years but watching the West Wing (not that way guys… actually watching the DVDs), raise a glass to our best friend Doug before you take a tiger snooze on a cold tile floor. We sincerely appreciate your business. Oh, and crack whores. (Just for the hits!)
Another person I love unconditionally, Parker Posey.
I’m seriously craving a nice vanilla fro-yo dipped in chocolate from the DQ. Too bad it’s winter, and the fucking Dairy Queen assumes that nobody wants ice cream in winter. If Your Majesty the Queen of Dairy is reading this, I can assure your highness, we do.
I might be a little late on the bandwagon for this, but I love Mindy Kaling. This isn’t just an “oh, I really appreciate Kelly Kapoor on The Office” kind of love (even though I do); it’s far more profound and well considered than that.
What provoked this, you ask? Well, actually, it was her totally awesome and hilarious column in the New York Times a few days ago (h/t Gawker). As I read it, it was like an epic epiphany. Like woah, I really really like this chick. Her jokes are funny, in the ha ha kind of way and in the ohhhh that’s really cute kind of way. DOUBLE FUNNY! That takes some skillz. Plus she makes really awesome cultural references to things like “13 Going on 30.” Fucking fab film.
Then I did some research. I already knew that she’s a writer on The Office, which, admittedly, has gotten less funny since Jim and Pam got together (am I the only person who liked Karen?). I’m assuming that our friend Mindy was responsible for one of the catchiest Office lines ever [everyone say it with me]: FASHION SHOW! FASHION SHOW! FASHION SHOW AT LUNCH! so cute.
I remembered she had a Twitter feed. Promptly checked that shit out, and was not disappointed. Key tweet?
Exactly how much clothing am I supposed to take off when I put on a robe at the hairdressers?
True story, Mindy (aka new best friend)!!!
Then, I found her blog. Even though it hasn’t been updated since May, it’s still amazing. We here at DBIH can only try to reach this level of future greatness. Maybe once we get our book deal. Until then, I am, as your ever-faithful servant, trying to become more like Mindy.
These are just like the glasses that Jappy bought that she never wears. Evidence for why I love Mindy Kaling, but only like Jappy.
I love Stanley Tucci. Look at this rugged piece of man meat:
Hotter than a stiff cock!
He was fantastic in The Devil Wears Prada:
look at this guy.
And adorable as Meryl Streep’s over-sexed, super short husband:
It's always been Julia.
I love that he is short, that he can rock round glasses, and also that he got to make out with Meryl in Julie and Julia. JEALOUS.
Despite Christmas lights everywhere and some pretty ugly Christmas trees (ie in the very bourgeois lobby of my apartment building), people here in sunny London are not in the Christmas spirit. It fucking sucks, because if you know anything about us Jews (me and Tall and kind of WorkChucks), you know that we love Christmas. Oh yes we do.
So, to get my dose of Christmas joy and love as I frantically write about such fascinatingly happy subjects as famine in Africa, negative sovereignty in Africa, and collapsed states in Africa (pattern?), I’ve been forced to go to DBIH favorite S$$ to listen to Christmas music there while I write. It’s actually been great, except for one thing:
They never play my favorite Christmas song. Never.
What’s my favorite Christmas song? Seriously? The best one.
You’re welcome. And Chappy Chanukah!
Since I’m in the midst of trying to pull a 12-page paper out of my ass, I only have time to post a quick pick-me-up video. So, for you, my loves:
I can’t believe I’d never seen this before. It involves 2 things I love: Asians and self-defense.
This reminds me, I haven’t had sushi in a while.
Also, via @maureenmegan, this is amazing. If you don’t love gospel music (then we shouldn’t be friends), at least skip to the end. It’s way worth it.
