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The Future Presidents of the United States

July 6, 2009
Future presidents right here!

Future presidents right here!

I learned something very important today: B-Bird and I have the capacity to solve all the world’s problems. We took what could have been a fairly blah Monday and turned it into a relay of learning, discourse, problem solving, and creation. Thus far today we have:

  1. Learned all about the differences between Hamas and Hezbollah, thereby making us veritable experts in the mid-east crisis
  2. Foiled the sexual aspirations of would-be terrorists by proving that when the get to “heaven” they will not be greeted by 72 virgins, but in fact 72 very pure white raisins. TAKE THAT TALIBAN!!
  3. Solved the health care crisis in the US, using a the wonderful memories of high school prom.
  4. Created a FOOL-PROOF AND 100% ACCURATE scale for hotness determination based upon the MPAA movie rating scale. Seriously. Start preparing your minds for the post to come that will describe it in infinitesimal detail, for they shall be BLOWN.
  5. Realized we had simultaneously discovered magically perfect jeans.
  6. Plotted our ascent into the highest political office in the land, and our first executive decisions after claiming said office (here is a hint: Walter Cronkite and Dennis Kucinich are going to LOVE US!!

As you can see, we cannot be stopped. Our power, glory, and ability to rock your collective worlds grows by the minute.

But really, did anyone ever doubt we couldn’t do it?

We can dance whilst holding cups filled with bright blue jungle juice.

We can dance whilst holding cups filled with bright blue jungle juice.

we both own this fabulous dress, and we both love being upside down.

we both own this fabulous dress, and we both love being upside down.

getting yourself upside down takes practice, and commitment.

getting yourself upside down takes practice, and commitment.

and finally, we both enjoy eating enormous cow-burgers. You know you can trust that.

and finally, we both enjoy eating enormous cow-burgers. You know you can trust that.

Watch out world. HERE. WE. COME.

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