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Vladimir Putin is a G…

August 6, 2009

In the second of our “better know a democratically-elected world leader dictator series,” I bring you Vladimir Putin. You might think I’m cheating on my love, Silvio Berlusconi, but I’m not. Plus, I’m entirely too terrified of Vlad to tell him that my love lies elsewhere. You have no idea how many people he has killed with his bare hands/pectoral muscles. No idea.

For his Rooskie countrymen, Putin likes to cultivate an image as an “outdoorsman,” probably because being ex-KGB isn’t “man of the people” enough.  Really, what is more scary than a former spy/trained survivalist? Not only can he pull a James Bond among the nouveau riche in Moscow, but he will also throw you off the Trans-Siberian Express Train to Vladivostock while he’s on his way to do some ice fishing off Lake Baikal. No joke. (NB: all geographic evidence courtesy of Map of the Modern World and Professor Keith Hrebenak).

Further evidence that Putin fits in just as easily at the G-20 summit (SOON TO BE HELD IN PITTSBURGH, PA!) as he does on the vast taiga of Central Russia with the reindeer herdsmen was found this morning on the Huffington Post, which, as always, told me something I already knew: Vladimir Putin is G. (see below)

Look at this guy

Look at this guy

In other news, one time at a G-8 summit, he got Nicholas Sarkozy plastered. For those of you that don’t speak French like me and Jack Donaghy, the news announcer inserts the appropriate snark when introducing this video: “Evidently, the president drank nothing but water.” Ha. Video below.

Also, has anyone noticed that when people say “Putin” with a French accent it sounds vaguely dirty? Now you will.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. TALL permalink
    August 6, 2009 12:55 pm

    that video is SO hilarious. also i wish the french would pronounce “putin” as they usually say it. which means whore. just like putanesca sauce in italiano means whore sauce. essentially, Putin = multilingual whore/badass supreme. seriously, thanks to vlad, now i know what the bottom part of the human half of a centaur looks like. think about it.

  2. Bubbles permalink
    August 17, 2009 11:07 am

    VLADIMIR PUTIN IS ON TOP OF MY LIST OF GREATEST FEARS. SERIOUSLY DON’T MOCK VLAD HE SEES ALL.

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