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Adventures in L.A. Part 1: A Death-Defying Trip to USC

June 2, 2010

This is part one of what I hope to be a multi-part series about my various exploits in Los Angeles. Will there really be more parts? Who the eff knows. Just enjoy the one you get, for the love of god.

Once upon a time, there was a girl named DirtyHippie, and she decided to be a proactive college student and begin doing the research for her senior thesis over her summer fun-cation in Los Angeles. In order to get started on this noble task, she took it upon herself to visit the University of Southern California’s library on her day off from work.

Lauinger, eat your heart out.

Now, DirtyHippie’s parents had warned her about USC, that it was not exactly “a nice place,” you see, but she assumed that they were simply being stuffy old something or others, and instead made her intrepid way down to the campus. She had survived three years at Georgetown without once being mugged, cuddled, or “biased-based” incident-ed, she would be fine. Because really, I mean, look at this place, it can’t be bad, right?

Pretty Flowers! This place must be safe!

look at that nightlife! Don't you just want to go there?!

WRONG.

Dirtyhippie had to call her parents and apologize for child-like foolishness, while simultaneously thanking every pagan god in the universe that she survived her mid-morning trip.

You see, what those pictures above fail to show you is that USC is located in a place in Los Angeles called Watts.

C'est Watts (I have no idea if that is correct French, nor do I care)

Now, by using your peepers and mind grapes all at once, I am sure you can deduce that Watts is located in what we not-so-fondly refer to as South Central Los Angeles. For those of you NOT in the know, this is not a place you want to be. The LA Riots? They were in South Central. The LA murder rate? Pretty much due entirely to the murder rate in South Central. This, my friends, is Watts:

hi there, burning car in the middle of an American street. Hi there.

Cross the street from USC's campus and this is where you are.

So, in sum: I don’t think DirtyHippie will be complaining about the safety at Georgetown quite so much any more.

Now, bring it on commentators on our Dear Blog here, tell me I am being elitist and closed minded. YOU JUST GO AHEAD. Nothing can stop me from saying crazy stuff.

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