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June 6, 2010

All of my best ideas come from either crack dreams or in the shower.  One such morning in le douche, I was listening to one of my favorite coked-out pop stars with no talent: Ke$ha.

Webster's Definition of Ke$ha? Talent.

Girlfriend has a shitty voice and her lyrics make no sense, but hot damn are her songs catchy.  I started thinking about the common theme in some of her tunes while I was scrubbing down, such as drinking, parties, drugs and “love.” Quite diverse and unlike anything on the radioz nowadays, but it made me think of DBIH favorite, Lindsay Lohan.

"My speech is gonna be affected/If I keep it up like a love-sick crackhead"

By some stroke of geniu$, I decided that my new goal in life – aside from being co-POTUS with DirtyHippie – is to create the first musical about Lindsay Lohan’s life, using only songs that Ke$ha has neither written nor actually performed (autotune is kind of a dealbreaker).  Use your mindgrapes to think about this people: “Don’t Stop”? “Your Love is My Drug”?  “Take It Off?” “Blah Blah Blah”? All of these perfectly describe La Lohan and her shenanigans that we love so much.  Maybe Ke$ha could play Dina in the production. I don’t know, but this idea is AWESOME. I challenge you to think of a better train wreck musical experience (High School Musical 3 does NOT count).

2 Comments leave one →
  1. dirtyhippie permalink
    June 6, 2010 4:32 pm

    numero uno: we are going to be the best co-POTUSes ever. I will probably rule from my permanent residence in California whilst you reign over Washington, DC and the east. I will only be at the White House for state dinners with countries that have good cuisine (Spain, France, Thailand etc.) and all night keggers.

    numero two: this IS the best idea ever. End of story.

    • TALL permalink
      June 6, 2010 4:49 pm

      there are going to be so many keggers. among the honored guests will be joe biden, rosa delauro and chuck schumer, our council of politibros. rosa will bring the poppers and biden will sing and dance.

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